Top Line Thoughts: I really enjoyed this show. The performances were amazing and I never really knew where it was going, which kept me interested. It does drag a little bit in the middle of the season but comes back swinging in episode 7. While it started off being about divorce and re-evaluating your life in your 40s which I obviously have no personal experience with and can’t relate to, it slowly became more about the existential crisis of growing older and becoming different people than we used to be when we were younger which I honestly think people of any age can relate to. If you’re worried about it being too emotional and earnest, the show is undercut with a very biting tone and sense of humor that definitely earn some laughs in the middle of more serious moments. It also hit home for me with the depictions of Jewish families in New York and New Jersey and also summer in NYC. Those are such familiar worlds that it made the entire series feel all the more real. 

Spoiler Section: There’s really so much I could say about this show. It is definitely one that gets you thinking about your life in the big picture. And for someone like me who has always been distinctly aware of time passing and things changing, those musings hit close to home. Again, I’m not in the getting married, having kids, and moving to the suburbs part of my life yet so I’m not exactly on the same page as the characters in this show but I think life kind of always feels like it’s changing around you and sometimes you stop and think “how did I get here?”. How did you get to this stage in your life and become the person you are? Not necessarily in a bad way but just in a “time passes right before your eyes” kind of way. And like the characters in the show, you don’t feel like any time has passed or that you are any different than you used to be, but it has and you are and trying to be that old person in this new stage of life is never going to work out. 

While I thought all of the performances in the show were great, it’s no real surprise that the standout was Claire Danes. First of all, I think she’s amazing in everything she does so I was already primed to like her in this. But her performance in episode 7 was so moving and heartbreaking it really elevated the show to another level. Her character and the way the show presents her is so interesting because from the beginning she’s painted as the villain. When the show starts, it’s from Toby’s point of view, so we’re seeing her the way he sees her. Even the flashbacks are his memories which are fully biased by his view of her and their relationship. We don’t know her side of the story until she tells it herself in episode 7. And her side is really one full of unresolved pain and trauma starting from early on in her life. All of these things she’s kept bottled up have been carried with her through all of her experiences. Everyone is so shaped by these things early in their life that make them who they are and inform how they act now and all the decisions they make. We’re usually quick to be mad at people for acting in ways we disagree with without thinking their actions probably come from deep seated traumas and insecurities that have shaped their world view. This doesn’t necessarily mean all indiscretions should be forgiven because it comes from a hurt place, but it does change the way we see these people. Rachel isn’t a villain, she’s just a person who doesn’t know how to deal with everything she’s experienced. We may not agree with everything she’s said and done but she doesn’t know any other way. The real twist of the show is how sympathetic of a character Rachel becomes after we have viewed her as the villain for the majority of the season. At this point, Toby almost becomes the villain because we’re seeing the story through Libby’s eyes. But then again, after spending the first half of the season with him, we can understand where he’s coming from when he lashes out at Libby and doesn’t seem to care about Rachel at all. I guess the moral is everyone has reasons for their behavior, whether we agree or understand it.

I’m torn on the ending. I would have liked to see more of Rachel in the last episode and what happened with her. I didn’t feel like there was much closure on her story. It gets very meta with Libby describing the ending of her book and then that scene playing out with Toby and Rachel. It’s hard to tell if that last scene is even real or just imagined. And if it is real, can these two people even repair their relationship or are they just too entirely different from the people they were when they met? Either way, I think the point is that this is just a glimpse at the life of these people and there isn’t really a neat ending that ties everything up. The central “mystery” of where Rachel went may have been solved but there is plenty more to deal with and new challenges are always right around the corner.

2023 Count: 1 season, 0 movies